Wednesday, 16 April 2014

From the BBC quizzes

Johnny Weissmuller died on this day. Which jungle-swinging character clad only in a loin cloth did he play?

They walk among us!  And they breed...


The teacher asked the class to use the word 'fascinate' in a sentence.

Molly put up her hand and said, 'My family went to my granddad's farm, and we all saw his pet sheep.  It was fascinating.'

The teacher said, 'That was good, but I wanted you to use the word 'fascinate, not fascinating'.

Sally raised her hand. She said, 'My family went to see Rock City and I was 'fascinated.'

The teacher said, 'Well, that was good Sally, but I wanted you to use the word 'fascinate.'

Little Johnny raised his hand. The teacher hesitated because she had been burned by Little Johnny before.

She finally decided there was no way he could damage the word 'fascinate', so she called on him.

Johnny said, 'My aunt Gina has a sweater with ten buttons, but her tits are so big she can only "fasten eight".

The teacher sat down and cried.

Monday, 14 April 2014

Global Warming getting serious

Global Warming?
See what happens when we cut down too many trees.
Global warming is One Thing..,
But look below at what can happen when we
continue to clear our forests!
We have to stop cutting down trees!
This is Getting Serious! 

True Victim of poor immigration controls

As I browse throught the newspapers today, I cannot find a factual report on events as they stand!  So, this is a Somali free zone except to remind readers that Somali illegals murdered policewoman Sharon Beshenivsky.

Sharon Beshenivsky  Police Constable West Yorkshire Police Died 18 November 2005, aged 38.

 While responding with a colleague to a personal attack alarm at a travel agency in Bradford, the officers were confronted by three armed robbers leaving the premises, shots were fired and she was hit in the chest and killed and her colleague injured.

I will also not be responding to the immigrants in London who demanded, on the Panorama programme last Monday, that I as a genuine Briton and having paid taxes through my family and for hundreds of years, and my own contribution of fifty years of meaningful employment, should fork out more to educate, feed and house their impoverished position, NO, I don't think so! 

Enough is enough! 

Go back to your own country and try your bleeding heart blackmail there!

It is about time we started thinking and caring for the real victims in life, such as the motherless children of the brave lass Sharon Beshenivsky.

Wednesday, 9 April 2014

Me Irish in-laws

An Irish  mother-in-law arrives home from the shops to find her son-in-law Paddy in a steaming rage and hurriedly packing his suitcase. 
"What happened Paddy?" she asks anxiously. 
"What happened!  What happened?  I'll tell you what happened!  I sent an email to my wife telling her I was coming home today from my fishing trip.  I get home... and guess what I found?  Yes, your daughter, my wife Jean, naked with Joe Murphy in our marital bed!  This is unforgivable, the end of our marriage.  I'm done.  I'm leaving forever!" 
"Ah now, calm down Paddy...  Calm down," says his mother-in-law.  "There is something very odd going on here.  Jean would never do such a thing!  There must be a simple explanation.  I'll go speak to her immediately and find out what happened." 
Moments later, the mother-in-law comes back with a big smile. 
"Paddy.  I told you there must be a simple explanation... she never got your E-mail!"

Tuesday, 8 April 2014

From Council to Cabinet, it just is not Right

 I want to tell you a Tory...

Once upon a time there was a reprobate with a sad record of misdeeds.  Unfortunately for Joe Public, there were a few, and I mean a few, who could believe lie after lie, because he was a member of  The Party.  They came from miles around, from lauded institutions and from privileged places, to worship at his feet whilst those who told the facts about this despicable lowlife were ushered out of the debating chambers, so not to offend those on their knees and genuflecting to a demogogue.
In the town where he had decided to migrate into, he had stolen from the Bus Drivers Association and got away with being prosecuted because of expedience.  For those who do not understand that word it means people in place charged with upholding ancient and hard fought for laws being rewarded by growing complacent and too lazy to do their jobs, such as the Coroner and the investigating team into the Corporate Murder of Blackpool veteran, Robert Michael Miller – no relation to the more infamous Miller with a suspect nature.
So there we have it. Way back in the 80’s and the wonderful Tory Teller had provided sufficient evidence to his character – or lack of it- giving legitimate grounds to be ostracised from any meaningful collection of well intended people I.E. A legitimate political party.  Instead, in political desperation, he was adopted and became a banner bearer - much against the wishes of many - and the front person for (1) A enterprise that sucked blood out of a genuine charity, Help for Heroes. (2) became a fulcrum in the much discredited Fylde Ex Service Liaison Committee with its secret bank accounts and dictatorial attitude towards the majority of professional servicemen and women who want nothing from them at all .

The final achievement in denigrating the service of all whom bore arms in Defence of the Nation was when the MoD conferred on him an ambassadorship for the Veterans Badge. What a slap in the mouth for all former professional soldiers, sailors and airmen (and women)!  It was akin to giving the keys to the children’s ward at Blackpool’s Victoria Hospital to Sir Jimmy Sa Vile.
What is worse is that those in authority and those in his own Party had been warned of this conduct and did nothing.  Are we guilty by association?  Ask the victims of the Concentration Camps and you'll get an accurate and reasoned response.

Another disappointment has to be the Member of Parliament for the Fylde.  As his story evolves, one fact remains symptomatic of our time; the young and disillusioned of the district around Lytham St Annes do not know who this person is.  They don't know of his alleged offences and have no idea of his history.  What is worse, they don't care.
So before all the bigots and religious zealots’ starts to howl, I for one do not give a fish’s left nipple about a person’s sexual orientation.  My only objection, and we have all been gagged into not being able to talk about these matter because of over sympathetic laws and laws that have denied Free Speech, is that too many have risen into places they are unfit for because of those very same insidious and grotesque gagging laws.
Whatever the allegations are against this man, let us hope that he gets a swift and thoroughly professional investigation into the charges.  Afterall, we have witnessed too many miscarriages of justice; Hillsborough, Steven Lawrence and many, many more.
If a person is fit and competent in a job, he /she ought to be left alone to get on with it.  It cannot be held against any individual that sexual orientation is a factor except where it is used to defend sexual deviants, child molesters and human traffickers.

Once again the spectre of Parliamentary Privilege and MP's expenses is being brushed under the carpet.  There is not a single right minded person who can defend the arrogance or the attitude that this person has shown towards the electorate.  All I want to say is is there any other vocation, occupation or call it what you will, where an employee can offset the purchase of homes against expenses paid by the very subjects they are entrusted to Govern?  Perhaps in Zimbabwe, South Africa, Italy and 200 other countries that one could think about?  But in honest and law abiding Britain, the Mother of all Parliaments, the cornerstone of all things Right…?
Why not publish the report by the Independent Body into MP’s expenses in full and uncensored?  Let those who can, read for themselves the conclusions and findings of the Independent body set up to scrutinise the debacle left by thieving Lieber?  Stop redacting the truth and give us credit for more sense that those in the Westminster Village.
This is just another example of why the People have to regain control of the Madhouse from those supposedly sent into it to represent us, as a whole, and not themselves as a privileged few!


Monday, 31 March 2014

The Time Machine

Barak Obama and David Cameron are shown a time machine which can see 100 years into the future.  They both decide to test it by asking a question each.

Barak goes first.

“What will the USA be like in 100 years time?”

The machine whirs and beeps and goes into action and gives him a  printout, he reads it out.  "The country is in good hands under the new president, crime is non-existent, there is no conflict, the economy is healthy. There are no worries!”

David thinks “It's not bad this time machine, I'll have a bit of that.”   So he asks:  “What will England be like in 100 years time?”  The machine whirs and beeps and goes into action, and he gets a printout.

But he just stares at it.

Come on David” says Barak, “What does it say?”

David replies,  “Buggered if I know! It's not in English!”

Sunday, 30 March 2014

Sarah Riding and Mark Menzies

Has Sarah Riding resigned?  Why has Mark Menzies resigned as PPS?

Well they definitely won't be in bed together, politically that is!!!

Fylde Coast Politicians running for cover

With one local civic leader running around the back gardens sniffing at the drying knickers on ladies clothes lines, a colleague tells a jury he is not a paedophile but they did not believe him and found him guilty of child abuse - irrespective of what the law calls it.  The Jury say he is guilty and the Courts find his conduct so harmless they awarded him funds to purchase more film for his camera.  What a sick interpretation or even sop for the victims of his awful crimes!

Now it is rumoured that Ms Sarah Riding's tenure as apologist for another planning disaster, the Talbot Gateway or as it is locally called "'Whatfuckingidiotbuiltthis' just another Road Block up the Councils Asshole Labyrinth and extension to the Promenade f*ckup" to give it its full title, has allegedly resigned.

A bit late girl.
Labour Councillor Sarah Riding

Lieber's favourite immigrant has already started parading his team along Church Street without notifying anyone that the Ward seat is becoming vacant.  Not that it matters much to Blackpool councillors as several Wards have long been short of representation, with several other councillors having vacated positions.  Pity the electorates hasn't noticed.

Lytham St Annes MP Mark Menzies

Not that we are allowed to notice anything.  Major Parties usher in whomever they wish and when they commit heinous indiscretions it is the electorate that is at fault!  I am more than happy for people to behave in private in a manner that adult participants enjoy, but do not do it while you represent me.  Now with Fylde Conservative MP Mark Menzies under scrutiny for activity that would have had most service personnel hung drawn and not quite quartered, it is about time we kicked all the politicians out who fall foul of what the Forces knew as Section 6 of the Navy Act, and Section 69 of the Army Act.  Conduct unbecoming of...

Small wonder politics is now the last bastion of the scoundrel.